


Reading is Good for the Brain

by abigail89



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Comedy, Crossover, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Ficlet, Fluff, Frottage, Post-War, Romance, The Quidditch Pitch: Television, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-11-28
Updated: 2007-11-28
Packaged: 2018-10-26 13:57:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10788063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abigail89/pseuds/abigail89
Summary: Harry Potter/Doctor Who -- Harry surfs the 'net and finds 'Shocfix' again.  Hermione and her new 'companion' know her stories, too.





	Reading is Good for the Brain

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Annie, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Quidditch Pitch](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Quidditch_Pitch), which went offline in 2015 when the hosting expired, at a time I was not able to renew it. I contacted Open Doors, hoping to preserve the archive using an old backup, and began importing these works as an Open Doors-approved project in April 2017. Open Doors e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Quidditch Pitch collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thequidditchpitch/profile).
> 
>  **Author's notes:** Written for shocolate's birthday, November 2007.

  
*~*

“Hey, Ron! Ron! C’mere!” Harry called from the lounge.

“What?” Ron came running in from the kitchen, wand in hand. “What is it?”

“I found her! That Shocolate person. I found her. Well, at least I think it’s a her.”

“Really? You found her on the fishing net? What happened to her? Has she written anything new?”

“That’s the Internet, Ron. And I dunno. Here, let’s see. Oh, yeah. She's been busy. Lookit that one!”

Ron breathed out a low, “Cor, blimey. Can you even do that sorta thing?”

Harry stared, his head cocked at a 45 degree angle, as if trying to imagine it on the screen. “Dunno. Oh, hey, here’s one we haven’t read.”

Reading, they both sucked in their breath. “Christ almighty. With a watermelon?”

“Oh my god. And we’re doing it together!”

Ron and Harry looked at each other, eyes wide and searching. Finally, Ron broke into a wide grin. “Wanna try it?”

Harry laughed. “No watermelons this time of year, mate. Unless we go to South America or something.” He leant over, scrolling through the stories. “Crikey, read this one!”

After a few minutes, Ron sniggered. “Does the Room of Requirement really keep a record?”

Harry shrugged. “I can check the archives next time I go up there to teach a practical lesson.”

“Yeah, do that. Wonder if Hermione has read any of these stories.”

“Ahhh, probably not. She’s too busy off in another dimension or something.”

“Is that what she and that bloke’re doing? Who was he again?

“The Doctor?”

“Doctor who?”

“That’s the one” Harry confirmed. “Y'know, they’re kinda perfect for each other.”

Ron snorted. “They can talk each other to death. Arguing is just foreplay.”

“You should know,” Harry said.

Ron pointed his wand across the room. “ _Accio_ chair!” The red wing chair hit a lamp and smacked into Ron’s chest. “Oof! A bit too hard, that.”

Harry sniggered again. “Reckon you’re just all worked up about Hermione and the Doctor.”

“Nope, not me. He can ‘ave her. Besides, I got you, don’t I?” Ron laid his hand on Harry’s shoulder.

Momentarily overcome, Harry patted his hand. “Let’s see what else she’s got here.”

“Insane journal,” Ron read at the top of the screen. “What the fuck is an insane journal?”

“It’s just the name of the site on the Internet,” Harry replied, entranced by the words before him. “Whoooooa…that one. Frottage. We did that the other day in my office.”

“Yeah, and it was good. But…cor, it’s just as hot when you read about it.”

A few moments passed, and Ron pulled Harry up and out of his chair. “Floor, now.”

Harry grinned as he laid on his back on the carpeted floor, and Ron covered him, grinding his erection into Harry’s. “Fuck, that’s gooood,” Harry moaned as Ron’s lips covered his.

Their kiss deepened. Ron held onto Harry’s hip, gaining purchase and in short order, he came. He gave Harry’s cock a squeeze and two tugs and then, Harry, too, came. Ron rolled off of him and onto the floor.

Breathing hard, Harry sought Ron’s hand. “That…was…nice. I’ll… be… sure… to… friend… her…journal…this…time.”

“Good inspiration, that,” Ron agreed, and raised their hands to his lips. “Can’t wait to try out that one in the jam story again.”

“Oh, that’s a classic. Marmalade or three-berry this time?”

*~*

“Good heavens! They still go at it like teenagers!” Hermione exclaimed, looking in the patio window.

“Yes, well, just think of the mess,” the Doctor said with a grimace.

“But wizards can clean themselves up, just like that,” and she snapped her fingers. “It’s called…”

“Don’t tell me! Don’t tell me! I know! It’s…it’s called… _Scourrrr…_ um… _Scuurrr--gi--fied!_ Yes, that’s it!” The Doctor smiled triumphantly.

“Well, it’s _Scourgify_ , actually,” Hermione corrected.

“D’oh! That’s it!” He smacked his forehead.

“Shhh! They’ll hear you,” she cautioned.

“Doubtful. I sense a force field around this window, maybe extending to the doorway over there. Strange sort of buzzing sound.” He pulled out The Sonic Screwdriver™, and fiddled with it. The chirping sound wavered. “Oh yes, very nice, very nice, well done. This is called…what?”

” _Muffliato!_ ” Hermione said, “Muffling Charm.”

“Wizards!” he said, impressed. “And here I thought we Time Lords were something special.”

“Oh but you are, Doctor, you are.”

“Well, I think we should just leave these two alone. You can visit them later, yeah? Besides, they may want to act out another one of Shocolate’s stories.” He grimaced again. “Yeaaah, don’t think I want to see that.”

“Well, you know, the Room of Requirement journal has some ideas in it that are pretty good too. I still can’t believe Minerva McGonagall was so naughty in her seventh year with—“

“Ah-ah-ahhh! We do not speak of the contents of the Room of Requirement journal outside the confines of Hogwarts archives. Spoils the mood, I think,” he said in his rapid fire way. “But we can look at the copy in the TARDIS.” He took her hand. “Come on. I saw something reeeally interesting from 15 November 1744 I’d like us to try.”

"And if not," she smiled, wickedly, "there's always the Mars Bar treat."

"Ooh, yes, good choice!"

Within a few minutes, the blue light on the TARDIS glowed, and then it disappeared in a gale of laughter.

*~*


End file.
